WEBVTT 00:08.560 --> 00:14.080 And this device measures the amount of blood in your vaginal cavity. 00:14.080 --> 00:15.760 I'm sorry, what?! 00:15.760 --> 00:17.440 Can I ask a question? Sure. 00:17.440 --> 00:21.000 Can you read my mind through my vagina? 00:21.000 --> 00:22.240 No. 00:22.240 --> 00:24.920 It's going in...now. 00:24.920 --> 00:26.400 Jesus. 00:26.400 --> 00:27.880 Can you guys see that it's in? 00:27.880 --> 00:29.560 I can see your signal. 00:29.560 --> 00:31.200 Oh, my God, my signal? 00:31.200 --> 00:33.000 The BLEEP is happening? 00:33.000 --> 00:34.360 Good question. 00:34.360 --> 00:37.800 Just how did I end up in a sex lab in the Netherlands 00:37.800 --> 00:40.120 with a probe up my vagina? 00:40.120 --> 00:41.800 I can see your vaginal pulse, yes. 00:41.800 --> 00:43.840 Great! I love that for us. 00:43.840 --> 00:48.480 Well, I'm on a very personal journey into my own sexuality. 00:48.480 --> 00:49.880 You may or may not know, 00:49.880 --> 00:52.320 I've had relationships with both men and women. 00:54.400 --> 00:57.920 But, I still struggle with being open, really open about 00:57.920 --> 01:00.600 just how much I love women. 01:00.600 --> 01:02.800 Growing up with a lot of shame and thinking, 01:02.800 --> 01:04.800 "This isn't normal, this isn't human" - 01:04.800 --> 01:06.600 but it's, like, it is. 01:06.600 --> 01:10.640 Will exploring the science of sexuality help me accept who I am? 01:10.640 --> 01:12.920 Oh, my God what's it doing?! 01:12.920 --> 01:15.200 The moment there was something sexual, 01:15.200 --> 01:18.280 you had this automatic genital arousal response. 01:18.280 --> 01:20.200 My full, glorious queer self? 01:21.920 --> 01:25.320 Can meeting other queer people from across the globe teach me 01:25.320 --> 01:28.000 how to be out, loud and proud? 01:28.000 --> 01:30.520 I think we need to be proud every day. 01:30.520 --> 01:33.320 Put your hand together for The Darvish! 01:33.320 --> 01:34.960 CHEERING 01:33.320 --> 01:34.960 Stunning! 01:34.960 --> 01:36.640 Well, I'm a homosexual. 01:36.640 --> 01:38.760 Very gay, over-the-top. 01:38.760 --> 01:40.200 Extremely flamboyant. 01:41.640 --> 01:43.240 Hold on to your seats, 01:43.240 --> 01:44.640 buckle in, 01:44.640 --> 01:47.200 it's going to be a bumpy, wild ride, folks. 01:47.200 --> 01:49.560 Loving the crowd's vibe today. Loving you guys! 01:49.560 --> 01:50.600 CHEERING 01:57.400 --> 02:00.120 OFF CAMERA: Are you ready to go talk about being ga-a-ay? 02:00.120 --> 02:02.360 Eey. Go gay. 02:02.360 --> 02:03.960 Queer is here. 02:03.960 --> 02:05.560 Cara Dele-queer. 02:05.560 --> 02:07.840 Serious, serious. 02:07.840 --> 02:11.560 I always have, kind of, believed in the no-labels thing, 02:11.560 --> 02:13.920 but again, have spent a lot of time then saying, 02:13.920 --> 02:16.120 "I'm bisexual, I'm pansexual". 02:16.120 --> 02:17.560 I am queer. 02:17.560 --> 02:19.880 I'm 100%, can tell you that I'm queer. 02:19.880 --> 02:23.360 I just don't know what else I can say other than that. 02:23.360 --> 02:24.960 Even though I've been queer, 02:24.960 --> 02:27.400 I haven't really been able to live a queer life. 02:27.400 --> 02:30.840 You know, the internalised shame or the, kind of, 02:30.840 --> 02:33.520 homophobia's slightly there still. 02:33.520 --> 02:36.560 When you are in this job or when you are famous, or something, 02:36.560 --> 02:38.040 it stunts a lot of things. 02:38.040 --> 02:39.800 I never really was in the community. 02:39.800 --> 02:42.480 Like yes, I, kind, of came out, but then, afterwards, 02:42.480 --> 02:43.920 I never went to Pride. 02:43.920 --> 02:45.520 I never went to these parties. 02:45.520 --> 02:48.640 I never met all of these people and, like, I didn't really 02:48.640 --> 02:50.600 develop my queerness. 02:50.600 --> 02:53.960 So, I think I'm just coming to it all very late. 02:53.960 --> 02:56.440 Does that make sense? Cool. 02:56.440 --> 02:57.480 Ahem. 03:04.040 --> 03:06.360 Well, no time like the present. 03:06.360 --> 03:10.000 I'm diving straight in at the deep end, headfirst. 03:10.000 --> 03:13.120 I don't know where I expected this journey to begin, 03:13.120 --> 03:16.520 but it wasn't slap-bang in the middle of the desert. 03:16.520 --> 03:18.960 Palm Springs. What do I know about Palm Springs? 03:18.960 --> 03:20.680 It's hot. It's a desert. 03:20.680 --> 03:24.000 This is a place where old people go to die. 03:24.000 --> 03:26.360 Joking! That was a joke. 03:26.360 --> 03:28.080 It's hot. It's so hot. 03:28.080 --> 03:30.560 No wonder...what? Why do people come here? 03:30.560 --> 03:31.600 It's so hot! 03:32.640 --> 03:38.280 Well, apparently if you're LGBTQ , this is the place for us. 03:38.280 --> 03:42.160 Once a desert hang-out for the 1960s Hollywood Rat Pack, 03:42.160 --> 03:46.000 Palm Springs is now one of the most progressive towns in America - 03:46.000 --> 03:50.200 and the first to have an all-LGBTQ council. 03:50.200 --> 03:53.720 So, it's a good place to dip my toe in the water - 03:53.720 --> 03:58.480 at the uniquely massive mother of all lady-loving events. 03:58.480 --> 03:59.920 I'm checking in, please. 03:59.920 --> 04:03.120 Yeah, of course, and what's the last name? Delevingne. 04:03.120 --> 04:09.000 D-E-L-E-V-I-N-G-N-E... it's hard to spell. 04:09.000 --> 04:10.760 Yes, it's true - 04:10.760 --> 04:13.880 I still never have been to Pride, or anything like that. 04:13.880 --> 04:15.560 I think I went the wrong way. 04:16.760 --> 04:21.400 Here it comes - my very first proper, big lesbian day out. 04:21.400 --> 04:22.880 Bloody Nora. 04:22.880 --> 04:25.480 So...do you come here often? 04:30.560 --> 04:32.840 So scared...scared. 04:34.800 --> 04:37.320 I'm a Cancer, and I like long walks on the beach. 04:37.320 --> 04:38.760 So do I. With you. 04:40.960 --> 04:43.160 OK, deep breath. 04:43.160 --> 04:45.520 Don't really know what to expect. 04:45.520 --> 04:46.840 Go round, go round. 04:46.840 --> 04:49.880 Abort, abort, abort mission. 04:49.880 --> 04:51.920 How intense can it be? 04:56.920 --> 05:00.520 This is the Dinah Shore weekend - 05:00.520 --> 05:03.760 the biggest lesbian pool party in the world! 05:03.760 --> 05:08.240 15,000 women, trans, and nonbinary folk out here in the desert 05:08.240 --> 05:12.120 unleashing their true sexual selves at a rare place 05:12.120 --> 05:15.080 that all can feel safe and free. 05:15.080 --> 05:19.640 You're coming in, and you just see an ocean of women and titties, 05:19.640 --> 05:21.800 and glitter, and pasties. 05:21.800 --> 05:25.400 A lot of dancing, a lot of twerking, a lot of making out, 05:25.400 --> 05:26.920 a lot of happy times. 05:26.920 --> 05:29.520 Different body types, different ethnicities, 05:29.520 --> 05:30.880 I just love it. 05:30.880 --> 05:34.000 It's like Disneyland for lesbians. 05:34.000 --> 05:38.440 It's clear I won't survive unless I find friends ASAP. 05:38.440 --> 05:39.480 Hi! 05:39.480 --> 05:43.040 Luckily, I got me some neighbours - Kimber and - Lily to hold my hand. 05:43.040 --> 05:45.160 All right, "Dinah" on three. One, two, three... 05:54.840 --> 05:59.800 Any hope I had of staying under the radar goes way out the window... 05:59.800 --> 06:03.120 ..as I'm hauled up on stage to judge a twerking contest. 06:05.000 --> 06:06.640 How is this my job? 06:24.160 --> 06:27.200 Nice crowd. Loving the crowd's vibe today, loving the vibe! 06:27.200 --> 06:29.280 Loving you all! 06:27.200 --> 06:29.280 CROWD CHEERS 06:33.520 --> 06:36.400 This place is wild - and loud - 06:36.400 --> 06:38.480 so you're going to have to read the next bit. 06:48.520 --> 06:52.120 Honestly, I feel accepted as myself. 06:52.120 --> 06:54.320 Perhaps for the very first time. 06:57.040 --> 06:58.400 What just happened? 06:58.400 --> 07:00.120 What didn't happen? 07:00.120 --> 07:03.080 I don't know. I think, I guess I...I don't know. 07:04.240 --> 07:07.680 I'm out and I'm proud, you know, to a certain extent, 07:07.680 --> 07:11.120 but in my own life, I didn't really find the community, 07:11.120 --> 07:12.760 and I didn't really speak, like, 07:12.760 --> 07:14.960 experience these sort of things, you know? 07:14.960 --> 07:19.040 I, kind of, did it in a public eye, which again, allowed myself to be, 07:19.040 --> 07:21.520 you know, pointed fingers at, or feel more of the hate than, 07:21.520 --> 07:24.040 I guess, the love, I suppose. So, it's a lot. 07:24.040 --> 07:26.520 There's so much love in there, you know? 07:26.520 --> 07:29.800 Oh, God, this is the journey, this is the discovery of... 07:29.800 --> 07:31.320 I don't know. Yeah. 07:33.240 --> 07:36.960 Like, I feel this is - it gives me like, I'm feeling things. 07:36.960 --> 07:38.120 I don't usually do that. 07:39.800 --> 07:42.960 It's Kimber's first time at the festival, too. 07:42.960 --> 07:46.800 I wish that I could go back to myself back when I was younger, 07:46.800 --> 07:49.200 and just, kind of, figuring out my sexuality. 07:49.200 --> 07:52.480 And I wish I could show myself what my life is today. 07:52.480 --> 07:56.680 I grew up in Tennessee in a very conservative family, 07:56.680 --> 07:59.240 very religious, and being gay was just, like, 07:59.240 --> 08:01.840 absolutely not acceptable. 08:01.840 --> 08:06.480 Here I am, erm, all these years later, and I have an unbelievable 08:06.480 --> 08:09.120 queer community around me. 08:09.120 --> 08:12.280 It's just so important to not feel alone. 08:12.280 --> 08:15.240 And I feel like a lot of queer people feel alone in that. 08:15.240 --> 08:17.680 And you're not going to feel alone here. 08:17.680 --> 08:20.560 Where we live, it's a little - there's not very many places. 08:20.560 --> 08:23.440 OFF CAMERA: Like, do you walk down the street holding hands? 08:23.440 --> 08:25.360 Er, probably not. 08:25.360 --> 08:28.440 It's amazing for me, especially, like, I didn't come out until, 08:28.440 --> 08:32.000 like, later in life so... I'm an old, I'm an old per... 08:32.000 --> 08:33.320 Old lesbian. 08:33.320 --> 08:36.760 So, yeah, for me, like, it's, erm... 08:36.760 --> 08:40.600 It just feels, like, very less, I don't know, stressful. 08:40.600 --> 08:43.680 Like, I don't feel like I need to hold back. 08:43.680 --> 08:46.880 I'm just - I'm pretty much me everywhere, 08:46.880 --> 08:50.280 But here, it's just a little extra, like, just total... 08:50.280 --> 08:53.200 It's emotional. 08:50.280 --> 08:53.200 SHE SNIFFLES 08:53.200 --> 08:54.240 Yeah. 08:58.760 --> 09:00.600 So. 09:00.600 --> 09:03.160 She's having a good time. That's all that matters. 09:03.160 --> 09:04.200 Sorry. 09:07.480 --> 09:11.320 It's incredible to be free just for a few hours. 09:11.320 --> 09:13.280 It feels like a weight has been lifted. 09:14.920 --> 09:15.960 Yes? 09:16.960 --> 09:18.320 Thank you! 09:18.320 --> 09:20.680 THEY CHEER 09:20.680 --> 09:23.840 Whoo! Yeah! 09:29.320 --> 09:31.240 I now have gay friends. 09:31.240 --> 09:34.080 OFF CAMERA: What have you learned? So, wait, I'm confused. 09:34.080 --> 09:36.560 Gig, pass me back, that I need it. 09:36.560 --> 09:40.240 OK, so what have I learned about myself? 09:40.240 --> 09:41.800 I love being queer. 09:47.360 --> 09:51.160 I just didn't realise until now how reassuring it is to be 09:51.160 --> 09:55.880 in this safe space with people who share the same feelings as me. 09:55.880 --> 09:57.920 But I still have a lot to learn. 10:00.600 --> 10:04.320 Bears have a flag? I love that! 10:04.320 --> 10:07.840 There are loads of queer identities to explore. 10:07.840 --> 10:09.360 Isn't she chic, darling? 10:09.360 --> 10:12.400 With all these different types of sexual orientation, 10:12.400 --> 10:16.880 even the LGBTQ community can get confused. 10:16.880 --> 10:21.040 So, you don't know the difference between your As, Bis, and pans? 10:21.040 --> 10:23.240 Don't worry, I'll call a doctor. 10:29.280 --> 10:33.560 Dr Ronx is an ER medic, queer activist, and educator. 10:33.560 --> 10:36.160 They'll help me straighten it all out. 10:36.160 --> 10:38.720 Well not straight-straight... look, you know what I mean. 10:38.720 --> 10:40.080 I love your trainers, babe. 10:40.080 --> 10:44.120 I want the quickfire highlights of a very complex subject - 10:44.120 --> 10:46.240 sexual orientation! 10:46.240 --> 10:47.880 OK, let's go, let's go, let's go. 10:49.560 --> 10:51.120 Lesbian. 10:51.120 --> 10:55.040 A lesbian is a woman who is attracted to another woman. 10:55.040 --> 10:56.160 Gay. 10:56.160 --> 10:58.240 Basically, men who sleep with, 10:58.240 --> 11:01.560 or who are romantically attracted to other men. 11:01.560 --> 11:04.600 Also can be extended to women who are attracted to women. 11:04.600 --> 11:05.960 Bisexual. 11:05.960 --> 11:09.960 I guess traditionally, bisexual people fancy men and women. 11:09.960 --> 11:11.160 Pansexual. 11:11.160 --> 11:15.400 People who are attracted to other people, 11:15.400 --> 11:18.760 regardless of their gender identity. 11:18.760 --> 11:20.160 Asexual. 11:20.160 --> 11:27.120 People who are not sexually attracted to other individuals. 11:27.120 --> 11:28.280 Queer! 11:28.280 --> 11:33.040 For me, it's anybody who is not heterosexual. 11:33.040 --> 11:35.640 I think it has to be that simple. 11:35.640 --> 11:40.040 OK, so we've got to grips with just a few of the bazillion 11:40.040 --> 11:42.160 sexual identities out there. 11:42.160 --> 11:46.440 But for me, there's one big question hanging over it all. 11:46.440 --> 11:49.200 Was I born this way? 11:49.200 --> 11:51.640 What is it that shapes our sexual orientation? 11:51.640 --> 11:54.480 Is it nature or nurture? 11:54.480 --> 11:57.760 Gerulf Rieger has studied this subject for years. 11:57.760 --> 11:59.360 Think about it like this. 11:59.360 --> 12:01.320 The majority of us are straight. 12:01.320 --> 12:04.400 We need our sexual orientation to create babies 12:04.400 --> 12:06.960 and continue to thrive as a species. 12:08.440 --> 12:11.400 So, the idea that the social environment has such profound 12:11.400 --> 12:16.160 influences on something so important to us just doesn't make any sense. 12:20.640 --> 12:24.520 Gerulf thinks our sexual orientation is innate and set 12:24.520 --> 12:26.480 before we're even born. 12:26.480 --> 12:29.800 Hello, hello, hello. How is everybody doing today? 12:31.160 --> 12:36.640 He believes there's no one factor that decides our sexual orientation. 12:36.640 --> 12:42.760 Just a big biological cocktail that shapes a spectrum of sexualities. 12:42.760 --> 12:46.520 First up, it's partly down to your genes. 12:46.520 --> 12:49.320 If you look at identical twins, 12:49.320 --> 12:54.360 which are genetically literally identical, if one is gay, 12:54.360 --> 12:58.120 the chance that the other one is gay is much, much higher. 12:58.120 --> 13:02.320 If one twin is gay, there's a 24% chance their identical 13:02.320 --> 13:04.640 sibling will be, too. 13:04.640 --> 13:09.040 But in nonidentical twin pairs, if one is gay, there's just 13:09.040 --> 13:12.680 a 15% chance their sibling will share their sexuality. 13:13.800 --> 13:18.440 Conclusion - genes play a part, but they're not everything. 13:19.440 --> 13:23.760 In fact, the latest research on half a million people showed that 13:23.760 --> 13:27.440 genes only account for up to 25% of the whole 13:27.440 --> 13:28.960 "what makes us gay" business? 13:30.720 --> 13:32.920 So, what's next, Gerulf? 13:32.920 --> 13:37.600 Well, he believes it's also hormones we're exposed to in the womb. 13:37.600 --> 13:39.000 One in particular. 13:40.520 --> 13:44.040 So, we do think that testosterone has a huge impact on 13:44.040 --> 13:46.000 our sexual orientation. 13:46.000 --> 13:51.080 But if you take newly-born rats and you inject them with testosterone, 13:51.080 --> 13:55.040 if they're female, then you can almost perfectly turn them around 13:55.040 --> 14:00.120 in their behaviour, including the fact that this female now wants 14:00.120 --> 14:01.840 to mate with other females. 14:03.560 --> 14:05.520 So, it's definitely a girl. 14:05.520 --> 14:07.440 Perfect. 14:07.440 --> 14:11.320 Lastly, he thinks antibodies play a part. 14:11.320 --> 14:15.560 Females who've had boy babies before are programmed to produce 14:15.560 --> 14:19.400 these fighty immune system proteins against you men. 14:19.400 --> 14:23.320 When the mother is pregnant for the first time with a son, 14:23.320 --> 14:27.240 she actually gets exposed to male typical proteins, 14:27.240 --> 14:30.720 which is something that her own body isn't used to. 14:30.720 --> 14:34.160 These antibodies stay in the mother's system. 14:34.160 --> 14:37.640 And if she's pregnant again with a second son, erm, 14:37.640 --> 14:39.520 those antibodies are waiting. 14:39.520 --> 14:43.920 There's a certain chance that they attack tissue around his brain, 14:43.920 --> 14:46.640 and could therefore disrupt the regular development 14:46.640 --> 14:48.640 of his sexual orientation. 14:48.640 --> 14:52.120 That could be why the more older brothers you have, 14:52.120 --> 14:54.040 the more likely you are to be gay. 14:55.160 --> 14:57.920 So, look, this is all very interesting, 14:57.920 --> 14:59.760 but what does it add up to? 15:01.120 --> 15:04.200 When it comes to the question of how innate is somebody's 15:04.200 --> 15:09.200 sexual orientation, my educated guess is probably 100%. 15:09.200 --> 15:13.520 It's something that really comes from within the person. 15:13.520 --> 15:16.400 What exactly are the ingredients? 15:16.400 --> 15:18.760 That's the million-dollar question. 15:18.760 --> 15:21.840 You can pack that judginess away, thank you very much. 15:21.840 --> 15:24.240 Sexuality isn't a choice. 15:24.240 --> 15:27.640 For me, it's hugely reassuring to hear, to be honest. 15:27.640 --> 15:29.320 I was born this way. 15:29.320 --> 15:32.200 What way? Well, kind of all the ways. 15:32.200 --> 15:33.320 Oh! 15:33.320 --> 15:35.720 Sexuality is definitely a spectrum, 15:35.720 --> 15:38.080 and I feel like mine waivers. 15:38.080 --> 15:42.680 But also, I'm probably definitely more on the side of women. 15:42.680 --> 15:47.160 But I don't - I like having sex with men, I just don't date them. 15:47.160 --> 15:49.520 I might, though, you never know. 15:49.520 --> 15:53.760 But again, I think it's a beautiful, unwavering, 15:53.760 --> 15:56.360 wavering, beautiful... 15:56.360 --> 15:57.520 ..moo. 15:58.880 --> 16:01.160 It feels like, over the last few years, 16:01.160 --> 16:04.800 there's been a new kind of openness and acceptance of this spectrum 16:04.800 --> 16:06.680 by young people. 16:06.680 --> 16:10.240 And I really wish I could've been a part of it. 16:10.240 --> 16:14.880 Today, only 54% of UK Gen Z'ers identify 16:14.880 --> 16:16.720 as exclusively heterosexual. 16:17.720 --> 16:19.280 Welcome! 16:19.280 --> 16:22.840 But the big change seems to be amongst women. 16:22.840 --> 16:27.840 In 2011, 77% of US university-age women were 16:27.840 --> 16:30.280 exclusively attracted to men. 16:30.280 --> 16:34.640 Yet, by 2019, that fell to 65%. 16:34.640 --> 16:37.160 But, guys, your numbers have stayed constant - 16:37.160 --> 16:41.320 with 85% of you totally straight... apparently. 16:45.400 --> 16:48.240 It seems like, particularly for women, 16:48.240 --> 16:53.040 working out your sexual identity isn't always straightforward. 16:53.040 --> 16:56.720 And that might be because, when it comes to who we find sexy, 16:56.720 --> 17:00.680 our bodies and minds aren't always on the same page. 17:00.680 --> 17:05.680 Dr Marieke Dewitte is an expert on sexual arousal. 17:05.680 --> 17:07.840 Are you Flemish? Yeah, I'm Flemish. 17:07.840 --> 17:10.040 I'm Flemish! A fellow Flem. Yeah. 17:11.680 --> 17:16.200 And I've signed up to her sex lab to dig deeper into what turns us on. 17:16.200 --> 17:18.160 By watching porn! 17:18.160 --> 17:20.000 All in the name of science, mind you. 17:21.120 --> 17:23.840 The watching porn part is going to be the really hard part, I think. 17:23.840 --> 17:26.800 Yeah, probably. Yeah, who wouldn't be excited by watching 17:26.800 --> 17:29.400 a whole lot of porn today? 17:29.400 --> 17:32.200 Come in, and welcome to our sex lab. 17:32.200 --> 17:35.760 So, what we'll do is we are going to present several video clips. 17:35.760 --> 17:37.480 Do you know what I just thought about? 17:37.480 --> 17:38.920 My parents watching this. 17:38.920 --> 17:41.840 OK, well, maybe you should've thought about that before. 17:41.840 --> 17:43.240 Try to ignore it. 17:43.240 --> 17:46.320 The main thing is actually what you need to do is just sit, 17:46.320 --> 17:49.040 relax, and try not to touch yourself and sit still. 17:49.040 --> 17:51.720 Try not to... Try not to. I can contain myself. 17:51.720 --> 17:54.200 Not touch yourself, and just watch. 17:54.200 --> 17:55.760 Yeah? OK, perfect. 17:55.760 --> 17:57.320 Have fun, Cara. I will. 17:57.320 --> 17:58.840 Yeah, definitely. I will try. 17:58.840 --> 18:00.800 SHE CHUCKLES 17:58.840 --> 18:00.800 Fuck. 18:00.800 --> 18:02.560 I'm sorry, this is what? 18:02.560 --> 18:04.040 And it goes where?! 18:04.040 --> 18:07.440 Basically, when you get sexually aroused, more blood 18:07.440 --> 18:09.920 is being pumped into your vagina. 18:09.920 --> 18:13.400 And therefore, the colour of your vaginal wall changes. 18:13.400 --> 18:18.120 And this device measures the amount of blood in your vaginal cavity. 18:19.120 --> 18:20.800 Can I ask a question? Sure. 18:20.800 --> 18:24.120 Can you read my mind through my vagina? 18:24.120 --> 18:25.440 No. 18:25.440 --> 18:28.600 It's going in...now. 18:28.600 --> 18:29.640 Great. 18:29.640 --> 18:31.040 Jesus. 18:31.040 --> 18:32.840 Can you guys see that it's in? 18:32.840 --> 18:35.760 I can see your signal. Oh, my God, my signal?! 18:35.760 --> 18:38.960 The fuck is happening? I can see your vaginal pulse, yes. 18:38.960 --> 18:41.000 Great! I love that for us. 18:42.240 --> 18:45.160 OK, try not to think about my parents. 18:45.160 --> 18:48.520 Or about the camera 12 inches from my face. 18:48.520 --> 18:52.800 My frankly ridiculous task is to watch different kinds of porn. 18:54.320 --> 18:58.640 While Marieke's monitor records how aroused my genitals are, 18:58.640 --> 19:02.200 I rate my subjective arousal, what I'm thinking, 19:02.200 --> 19:07.080 on a sliding scale from completely ice-cold to smoking hot. 19:08.200 --> 19:10.680 OK, fire it up! 19:10.680 --> 19:13.360 First, two guys shagging each other. 19:13.360 --> 19:16.920 I can feel my breath shortening, or whatever crap. 19:16.920 --> 19:19.320 We can see that there is at least something happening. 19:19.320 --> 19:21.240 The peaks are closer to each other. 19:21.240 --> 19:23.680 Then, lesbian sex. 19:23.680 --> 19:25.720 Yeah, OK. 19:25.720 --> 19:28.840 My body feels, like, that shivery feeling again. 19:28.840 --> 19:30.600 Great. 19:30.600 --> 19:32.560 Weird. This is strange. 19:32.560 --> 19:35.320 Just had a real big influx of horniness, and then, 19:35.320 --> 19:37.280 a real big influx of shame. 19:37.280 --> 19:40.480 How bad is that still? Why? 19:40.480 --> 19:43.480 Now there seem to be a little bit more peaks. 19:43.480 --> 19:45.160 Straight sex. 19:45.160 --> 19:48.720 He's not very good at this. 19:45.160 --> 19:48.720 SHE LAUGHS 19:48.720 --> 19:50.320 There's men masturbating. 19:50.320 --> 19:52.960 I'm less horny than I thought I was. 19:52.960 --> 19:57.000 Oh, Lord. Her body is reacting here to the gay porn. 19:57.000 --> 19:59.600 You can see the peaks going up. 19:59.600 --> 20:01.240 Women masturbating. 20:01.240 --> 20:02.800 This seems uncomfortable. 20:02.800 --> 20:04.480 It's those fake nails, bro! 20:04.480 --> 20:07.480 You are going to say something different, aren't you, vagina? 20:07.480 --> 20:10.960 And then, a surprise little bonus clip of some hairy monkey sex. 20:12.600 --> 20:14.640 OK, this is properly weird now. 20:14.640 --> 20:16.960 Oh, my God, what's it doing?! 20:16.960 --> 20:19.160 It's called oral sex. 20:19.160 --> 20:21.880 This is wild. Literally. 20:23.400 --> 20:25.640 An hour later, that's it, I'm done. 20:25.640 --> 20:27.840 I don't even know how to feel any more. 20:29.120 --> 20:31.480 So, there she is. How was it? 20:31.480 --> 20:34.160 Do I look traumatised? Not at all. 20:34.160 --> 20:35.720 Did you find it traumatising? 20:35.720 --> 20:37.720 No. Maybe. 20:37.720 --> 20:42.560 But what the F does this all mean when it comes to sexual arousal? 20:42.560 --> 20:44.400 What did we learn? What did you see? 20:44.400 --> 20:46.880 So, the moment there was something sexual, 20:46.880 --> 20:49.440 you had this automatic genital arousal response. 20:49.440 --> 20:52.280 You've learned this is sexual, so you react. 20:52.280 --> 20:55.520 So, it sounds like my genitals find everything - 20:55.520 --> 20:57.560 human and animal - sexy. 20:57.560 --> 20:59.480 But is this to be expected? 20:59.480 --> 21:03.400 Your response actually matched with what we saw in previous research - 21:03.400 --> 21:07.160 that the genital arousal response of women is rather nonspecific. 21:07.160 --> 21:11.360 It kind of shows that for women, it's sexual activity that matters. 21:11.360 --> 21:14.760 It says nothing about your sexual orientation or sexual identity. 21:14.760 --> 21:17.760 Cos also, matters of the genitals are not matters of the heart. 21:17.760 --> 21:21.160 So sometimes, women who do not, kind of, identify as being lesbian, 21:21.160 --> 21:23.440 they get turned on by the woman, and it's like, 21:23.440 --> 21:25.720 "Oh, oh, my God, is this" - they get confused. 21:25.720 --> 21:27.800 Women get aroused by different stimuli. 21:27.800 --> 21:31.320 So, it's not some secret lust for monkeys, 21:31.320 --> 21:34.560 but a primal evolutionary response. 21:34.560 --> 21:38.720 Surprisingly, women's genitals react to a wide range of sexual 21:38.720 --> 21:42.720 activity that has little to do with their sexual orientation. 21:42.720 --> 21:47.320 But our minds? Well, that's a completely different story. 21:47.320 --> 21:50.920 Your subjective sexual arousal clearly differ depending on 21:50.920 --> 21:53.200 the type of porn you were watching. 21:53.200 --> 21:57.360 And what we saw in your pattern, it seems that especially the lesbian 21:57.360 --> 22:00.960 porn in specific really turned you on, in terms of subjective arousal. 22:00.960 --> 22:03.160 Does it match your sexual orientation? For sure. 22:03.160 --> 22:05.920 Do you feel more attracted to women? 22:05.920 --> 22:11.240 And so, generally, I think women are my preferred gender, I suppose. 22:11.240 --> 22:13.880 How you feel, the mental component - 22:13.880 --> 22:16.120 we see that in women, it's a bit more specific, 22:16.120 --> 22:19.280 that what really turns you on is, kind of, a little bit more tied 22:19.280 --> 22:20.840 to what you also prefer. 22:22.640 --> 22:26.320 My mind is much more in sync with my own sexual orientation - 22:26.320 --> 22:32.040 but men only react physically to the stuff that turns them on mentally. 22:32.040 --> 22:34.640 So, men actually only respond to stimuli that match 22:34.640 --> 22:36.040 their sexual orientation. 22:36.040 --> 22:39.320 For men, when they don't like it, they don't get an erection. 22:39.320 --> 22:41.880 So then, nothing is possible any more. 22:41.880 --> 22:46.040 So, in a nutshell, both our bodies and minds feed into this thing 22:46.040 --> 22:48.240 we call sexual orientation. 22:49.360 --> 22:53.120 And Marieke's experiment may show why women appear more 22:53.120 --> 22:54.840 sexually fluid than men. 22:56.000 --> 23:01.400 Crucially, none of it's a choice - and for me, that's a relief. 23:01.400 --> 23:05.560 I think it's also asking yourself, or thinking whatever you're doing, 23:05.560 --> 23:08.040 however you're feeling is not natural. Exactly. 23:08.040 --> 23:11.240 Always what I would think, growing up with a lot of shame, 23:11.240 --> 23:13.920 is thinking, "This isn't normal, this isn't human" - 23:13.920 --> 23:15.080 but it's like, it is. 23:15.080 --> 23:16.560 Yeah, I mean at this point... 23:16.560 --> 23:19.720 Yeah, that's what it always comes back to. 23:19.720 --> 23:21.000 The shame. 23:21.000 --> 23:24.960 The pressure from society and the world around me. 23:24.960 --> 23:28.560 Shame doesn't change your innate sexual orientation, 23:28.560 --> 23:31.720 but it sure does affect how you feel about your sexual identity 23:31.720 --> 23:33.440 when you're not straight. 23:35.200 --> 23:38.920 In the UK, male same-sex relationships were decriminalised 23:38.920 --> 23:40.880 55 years ago. 23:40.880 --> 23:44.800 But laws banning talking about gay love in schools - 23:44.800 --> 23:50.240 the infamous Section 28 - were only lifted when I was 11. 23:50.240 --> 23:54.200 Growing up, the messaging was loud and clear. 23:54.200 --> 23:57.520 I couldn't talk to anyone about it, 23:57.520 --> 24:01.800 and I definitely had a lot of, like, internalised homophobia and shame. 24:01.800 --> 24:04.800 I thought that I was, like, abnormal. 24:04.800 --> 24:06.800 Everyone else was right and I was wrong, 24:06.800 --> 24:09.040 cos I wasn't like everyone else. 24:09.040 --> 24:12.120 I thought about ending my life, like, I had multiple times. 24:12.120 --> 24:15.400 And, like, I'm so glad I didn't because if I can help any other kid, 24:15.400 --> 24:17.240 then that means the world to me. 24:17.240 --> 24:21.400 That means the world to that little queer kid... 24:21.400 --> 24:22.920 ..that I was - or am. 24:27.480 --> 24:30.120 I know I shouldn't feel shame. 24:32.160 --> 24:37.440 But I truly believe there are souls all over the world like me, 24:37.440 --> 24:40.040 battling internalised homophobia, 24:40.040 --> 24:41.800 feeling lost and alienated. 24:43.920 --> 24:47.040 I want to meet people who can help me move on 24:47.040 --> 24:48.800 and accept myself for who I am. 24:50.160 --> 24:54.280 Come on, take me somewhere fucking cool and sort me out, people! 25:01.240 --> 25:03.600 Here's what I love about Tokyo. 25:04.720 --> 25:08.680 A busy modern city - and yet, bang in the middle of it, 25:08.680 --> 25:12.480 ancient traditional scenes like this. 25:12.480 --> 25:16.360 This land of contrast is the only country in the G7 25:16.360 --> 25:20.040 that doesn't officially recognise same-sex unions. 25:20.040 --> 25:24.440 And when tradition and religion is deeply embedded in your family life, 25:24.440 --> 25:27.240 growing up gay can be a scary thing. 25:27.240 --> 25:28.880 And this is the ceremony hall. 25:36.000 --> 25:40.200 Kodo Nishimura grew up right here, in this Buddhist temple. 25:40.200 --> 25:42.960 It's like a wedding is ceremony. I know, look! 25:44.040 --> 25:45.640 I feel like we could be married. 25:47.000 --> 25:48.720 We have shared beliefs. 25:50.440 --> 25:54.480 Even as a child, Kodo felt different from all the other kids. 25:55.840 --> 26:00.120 I noticed that I shouldn't talk about my interest in boys publicly, 26:00.120 --> 26:04.200 because most of the time, homosexual people were portrayed 26:04.200 --> 26:09.440 as villains or creepy in animes for children. 26:09.440 --> 26:13.280 I was constantly feeling like there was a huge black cloud 26:13.280 --> 26:15.600 above my head. 26:15.600 --> 26:18.760 Kodo feared that his religion would never accept him. 26:20.200 --> 26:24.840 So, I was really rebellious and... 26:24.840 --> 26:28.200 Yeah, I really didn't want to be associated with Buddhism. 26:28.200 --> 26:32.880 He needed to find community in a place that understood who he was. 26:32.880 --> 26:35.920 Moving to the US was such a liberation for me. 26:35.920 --> 26:40.880 I kept seeing LGBTQ Pride parades or TV shows, 26:40.880 --> 26:43.720 and male clerks selling make-up, 26:43.720 --> 26:46.120 and I saw somebody who are like me, 26:46.120 --> 26:49.960 struggling with similar situations, thriving. 26:49.960 --> 26:54.440 So, to see these representation really helped me 26:54.440 --> 26:56.680 to reset my normal. 27:00.720 --> 27:02.320 But as time went on, 27:02.320 --> 27:06.680 Kodo felt the pull of the old family tradition of Buddhism. 27:06.680 --> 27:10.160 I had questions, like, what happens if I die? 27:10.160 --> 27:11.640 Or why do we have to be good people? 27:11.640 --> 27:16.040 Right. I felt that, well, I don't like Buddhism, 27:16.040 --> 27:22.480 but I should face what it's like and see how I can evolve. 27:22.480 --> 27:27.040 In 2013, he returned to train as a monk, apprehensive about 27:27.040 --> 27:29.480 whether he'd ever fit in. 27:29.480 --> 27:32.440 What I discovered was surprising. 27:32.440 --> 27:36.160 When I was talking to a master about my sexuality, 27:36.160 --> 27:39.760 he said that Buddhism is very embracive. 27:39.760 --> 27:43.560 It says, "The mercy of Buddha is just like the moonlight". 27:43.560 --> 27:47.840 We can prioritise our uniquenesses and shine in our own colour. 27:48.920 --> 27:51.560 I felt that I was really protected. 27:51.560 --> 27:56.480 And because I got this teaching, I felt that it is my responsibility 27:56.480 --> 28:00.240 to spread this message of equality in Buddhism 28:00.240 --> 28:02.800 to people in the world. 28:02.800 --> 28:05.680 The sense of community he was searching for 28:05.680 --> 28:08.680 had been in Japan all along. 28:08.680 --> 28:10.760 Here we go. Oh, my gosh! 28:10.760 --> 28:12.640 Wonderful style of shirt. 28:12.640 --> 28:14.920 Oh, my God, I'm obsessed! 28:14.920 --> 28:20.280 I think the courage to speak up is actually cooler than 28:20.280 --> 28:22.960 pretending to be perfect. Yes. I completely agree with you. 28:22.960 --> 28:26.280 So, yeah, so I will... High five to that. 28:26.280 --> 28:29.240 So now, I'm going to transform and... 28:29.240 --> 28:31.400 Transform away. I will leave you. 28:31.400 --> 28:33.360 I will love you and leave you. OK, cool. 28:34.560 --> 28:38.320 Today, Kodo is a celebrity in his homeland, 28:38.320 --> 28:42.760 using his skills as an author, activist, and make-up artist 28:42.760 --> 28:44.760 to spread the message of harmony. 28:46.280 --> 28:49.000 I think what I find so inspiring about him 28:49.000 --> 28:51.040 is that just by being visible, 28:51.040 --> 28:53.800 he's changing society around him. 28:55.520 --> 28:57.520 Yes, gorgina! 29:00.440 --> 29:03.560 Oh, my God, you look amazing. Thank you. 29:03.560 --> 29:06.800 What would you like for the future, and for the future of Japan? 29:06.800 --> 29:10.480 If I can inspire leaders of the world, also religious leaders 29:10.480 --> 29:15.560 to lift the laws against LGBTQ people, that would be wonderful. 29:15.560 --> 29:18.520 Because we have to be safe to be us. 29:18.520 --> 29:20.160 And we're not going anywhere. 29:21.520 --> 29:26.560 What an incredibly strong, but also wise person he is. 29:26.560 --> 29:29.960 No matter how much the traditional side has probably stopped him 29:29.960 --> 29:32.120 from wanting to be the certain way, 29:32.120 --> 29:34.320 his heart and his light have shone through. 29:34.320 --> 29:35.880 I've just learned a lot from him. 29:35.880 --> 29:39.200 Being happy in yourself, within yourself gives you the resources 29:39.200 --> 29:40.880 to be able to help other people. 29:40.880 --> 29:43.200 And that's what is most important in the world. 29:43.200 --> 29:44.840 Thank you. 29:44.840 --> 29:50.880 Kodo got his happy ever-after returning home to a warm welcome. 29:50.880 --> 29:54.080 It's the coming-out story everyone dreams of. 29:54.080 --> 29:56.360 And I guess me, too. 29:56.360 --> 30:01.280 But the truth is, so many people don't get to go home. Ever. 30:04.800 --> 30:08.160 I want to meet those brave people who've travelled 30:08.160 --> 30:12.200 across the world to live an out, queer, proud life. 30:15.520 --> 30:18.040 Where's a force of nature when you need one? 30:19.280 --> 30:21.680 BUBBLE GUM POPS 30:19.280 --> 30:21.680 Sound check. 30:21.680 --> 30:24.200 My name is The Darvish, 30:24.200 --> 30:29.520 and I am a Syrian performance artist, 30:29.520 --> 30:33.080 a event organiser, community changer, 30:33.080 --> 30:35.840 and an LGBTQIA rights advocate. 30:35.840 --> 30:39.640 And, erm, I consider myself a force of nature. 30:40.720 --> 30:42.840 Hello. Hello, my love. 30:42.840 --> 30:45.080 My man, indeed! Hi, my love, 30:45.080 --> 30:49.600 Oh, my goodness. My man! Hello there. Hi. How are you? 30:51.080 --> 30:57.160 I realised when I'm queer probably in the age of 14. 30:57.160 --> 30:59.320 Up and straight, then you drop it. 30:59.320 --> 31:00.600 One and two. 31:00.600 --> 31:05.680 And then, the journey started of me immediately realising that 31:05.680 --> 31:09.120 this is a taboo in the country that I am in right now. 31:09.120 --> 31:14.000 And that it is dangerous for me to, you know, own it. 31:14.000 --> 31:20.120 So, yeah, started, er, living more carefully and cautiously 31:20.120 --> 31:22.360 but gracefully. 31:20.120 --> 31:22.360 LAUGHTER 31:24.600 --> 31:27.240 Yeah, use the hand, OK! 31:27.240 --> 31:29.360 She's getting it! OK. 31:29.360 --> 31:34.640 Same-sex relationships in Syria are punishable by three years in prison. 31:34.640 --> 31:37.360 But when Isis overtook parts of Syria, 31:37.360 --> 31:42.320 this situation became even more desperate for LGBTQ people. 31:42.320 --> 31:44.600 And The Darvish had to make a choice. 31:44.600 --> 31:46.400 The war got really serious. 31:46.400 --> 31:50.000 Persecutions and executions, and stuff like that. 31:50.000 --> 31:52.000 That's where it really hit us. 31:52.000 --> 31:54.400 We cannot be visible at all. 31:55.560 --> 31:59.560 The decision of me leaving Syria, that was the hardest thing. 31:59.560 --> 32:01.840 Choosing my life. 32:05.760 --> 32:07.400 And... 32:09.120 --> 32:11.080 Yeah. 32:11.080 --> 32:12.520 One second. 32:14.440 --> 32:18.240 For The Darvish, their imagination became their refuge. 32:21.520 --> 32:24.920 I focused on imagining how my life would be. 32:24.920 --> 32:27.760 You can be you... 32:27.760 --> 32:29.480 ..free. 32:29.480 --> 32:33.600 The Darvish has now been safe in Berlin for six years. 32:33.600 --> 32:39.000 The minute I arrived here, I was able to let go of everything. 32:39.000 --> 32:43.240 Yeah. Start the journey of self-discoveration, 32:43.240 --> 32:44.800 and what a journey. 32:46.800 --> 32:50.400 Your mum, she understood, though, you leaving? Or not? 32:50.400 --> 32:52.320 Well, she didn't want to. 32:52.320 --> 32:53.880 She didn't want to understand. 32:53.880 --> 32:57.160 It was very hard for her, for me to leave, but I think I made 32:57.160 --> 33:05.040 my point very clear that if I stay, there's no future for me. 33:05.040 --> 33:07.280 Yeah. You know? 33:07.280 --> 33:10.360 It got too dark, right? 33:10.360 --> 33:12.080 I don't like it. Oh, no. 33:12.080 --> 33:15.040 I thought you meant life. 33:12.080 --> 33:15.040 THEY LAUGH 33:19.040 --> 33:21.360 The Darvish was supported by their community 33:21.360 --> 33:23.280 when they arrived in Germany, 33:23.280 --> 33:24.920 and now they're giving back. 33:26.200 --> 33:29.360 Tonight, they'll be performing with their collective called 33:29.360 --> 33:32.560 Queens Against Borders, working for trans and queer refugees. 33:32.560 --> 33:35.920 Hello, hello, hello, hello! 33:35.920 --> 33:38.360 CHEERING 33:38.360 --> 33:43.360 Woohoo! Oh, OK! 33:43.360 --> 33:45.920 Thank you so much, everyone, for being here with us 33:45.920 --> 33:47.320 tonight in this fundraiser. 33:47.320 --> 33:49.720 We're very, very glad that you're here. 33:49.720 --> 33:51.400 Whoo, whoo, whoo! 33:52.600 --> 33:53.960 Yes! 33:55.320 --> 33:56.800 Whoo! 34:00.680 --> 34:04.640 Finding and building a community anywhere in the world, 34:04.640 --> 34:08.120 whatever community it is, is super vital. 34:16.800 --> 34:21.120 The community that I have built brought to me everything 34:21.120 --> 34:24.840 that I could ever imagine, which is me being me. 34:33.240 --> 34:37.680 Please put your hands together, for the gorgeous, the stunning, 34:37.680 --> 34:41.160 the beautiful, the one and only The Darvish! 34:41.160 --> 34:43.800 CHEERING 34:43.800 --> 34:46.400 ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYS 34:49.440 --> 34:52.320 THROBBING DANCE MUSIC 34:52.320 --> 34:54.520 CHEERING CONTINUES 34:55.840 --> 35:02.720 I choose my dance and my passion, my performances to say something. 35:02.720 --> 35:07.080 I am trying my best to have the visibility here in order later 35:07.080 --> 35:09.320 to mobilise it there in Syria. 35:13.640 --> 35:16.840 I'm beginning to understand what I've been missing by not being 35:16.840 --> 35:18.360 more active like The Darvish. 35:20.760 --> 35:24.680 By expressing their true selves, they manage to shed the shame. 35:26.200 --> 35:29.520 Look, my struggle's nothing compared to The Darvish. 35:29.520 --> 35:33.560 But they have given me so much to think about. 35:33.560 --> 35:36.800 I don't really go to gay bars. I mean, I'm a shit gay person. 35:36.800 --> 35:39.960 Also because I think that comes from a deep line of, like, 35:39.960 --> 35:42.160 not really wanting to be gay that much. 35:42.160 --> 35:45.480 With every story, there's been... 35:45.480 --> 35:49.960 It's been plagued with some, sort of, element of heartbreak, 35:49.960 --> 35:53.960 but then, some massive amount of joy, you know? 35:53.960 --> 35:56.400 And that's the magic of queer people. 35:59.840 --> 36:04.240 All over the world, there are communities of LGBTQ people 36:04.240 --> 36:07.120 creating islands of hope. 36:07.120 --> 36:10.280 And perhaps none more so than in South Africa. 36:11.680 --> 36:16.160 In 1996, the new constitution was the first in the world 36:16.160 --> 36:20.160 to outlaw discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. 36:20.160 --> 36:24.880 And the country was fifth in the world to legalise same-sex marriage 36:24.880 --> 36:28.120 in a continent where no other country has. 36:28.120 --> 36:33.880 No wonder South Africa is a haven for LGBTQ refugees. 36:35.080 --> 36:38.120 In Johannesburg a support group at the, well, 36:38.120 --> 36:41.680 perhaps surprising location of the Holy Trinity Catholic Church 36:41.680 --> 36:43.680 brings them together. 36:43.680 --> 36:47.560 My name is Victor Motlasa. 36:47.560 --> 36:50.960 I was born in Lesotho, I'm 24 years old. 36:50.960 --> 36:55.160 I stopped going to church because I was facing a lot of discrimination, 36:55.160 --> 36:56.560 a lot of hate. 36:56.560 --> 36:59.840 You, as a flamboyant gay man, in coming into South Africa, 36:59.840 --> 37:01.200 was there a change? 37:01.200 --> 37:04.120 Coming to South Africa, I think it was a blessing 37:04.120 --> 37:05.920 because you got to be yourself. 37:05.920 --> 37:08.120 You got to express yourself the way you want. 37:08.120 --> 37:10.920 I couldn't even wear a crop top in Lesotho, or like, why, 37:10.920 --> 37:12.720 why would I do that, or a short? 37:12.720 --> 37:16.640 Because I have to - they have an ideal man that you have to be, 37:16.640 --> 37:18.360 you have to dress like this. 37:18.360 --> 37:20.400 You have to walk like this person. 37:20.400 --> 37:25.040 You have to go play soccer, or you have to go look after the cows. 37:25.040 --> 37:28.840 THEY LAUGH 37:25.040 --> 37:28.840 Imagine, imagine! 37:28.840 --> 37:31.760 Every morning, every morning, I will have to be here. 37:31.760 --> 37:33.280 I will have to go... 37:33.280 --> 37:38.120 I find a group, like, as a family because I think they provide 37:38.120 --> 37:42.600 a safe space where you can literally talk about your problem. 37:44.160 --> 37:52.760 Today, an estimated 634,000 identify as LGBTQ in South Africa. 37:52.760 --> 37:56.040 In communities like these, to quote The Darvish, 37:56.040 --> 37:59.120 people can be themselves - free. 37:59.120 --> 38:01.200 And you kiss and kiss, and kiss up until... 38:01.200 --> 38:03.560 Kiss another boy. Kiss another boys, have fun. 38:03.560 --> 38:08.680 If we get, like, spaces where we can enjoy as the queer community, 38:08.680 --> 38:13.000 like, we get to feel that love within ourselves. 38:18.200 --> 38:22.080 Spaces like this are definitely important because, I don't know, 38:22.080 --> 38:25.440 I just feel so much more me. 38:25.440 --> 38:30.040 Well, I'm a homosexual, very gay, over-the-top, 38:30.040 --> 38:33.000 extremely flamboyant. 38:33.000 --> 38:35.280 We want to get married and just settle down, 38:35.280 --> 38:36.880 and just live a beautiful life. 38:36.880 --> 38:41.360 And have fur babies, cos I don't want, like, actual ones. 38:41.360 --> 38:44.640 Every one of these people has been brave enough to put themselves 38:44.640 --> 38:48.920 out there, despite all the challenged they've faced. 38:48.920 --> 38:50.480 So, what about me? 38:50.480 --> 38:52.960 I may have been open about being into women, 38:52.960 --> 38:56.320 but boy, have I missed out on a bigger picture. 38:57.600 --> 39:00.640 A life-affirming queer community. 39:00.640 --> 39:06.400 It's all been a very interesting journey of meeting wonderful people, 39:06.400 --> 39:11.240 you know, plagued with quite horrible circumstances sometimes. 39:11.240 --> 39:18.200 It's just made me really want to be louder about what I believe in. 39:18.200 --> 39:19.560 Moshi, moshi! 39:21.400 --> 39:23.240 But what do I do, really? 39:23.240 --> 39:26.520 How can I stand up and fight for my community, 39:26.520 --> 39:30.400 and live that true proud, out life? 39:30.400 --> 39:33.200 Well, there's one small thing I can do. 39:33.200 --> 39:34.760 I can show up. 39:34.760 --> 39:38.240 It's time to stop hiding and do what I said at the start 39:38.240 --> 39:40.600 that I've never done before. 39:40.600 --> 39:44.440 Yes, at last, I'm going to go to freaking Pride! 39:46.200 --> 39:48.640 I want that outfit! You look amazing! 39:51.000 --> 39:53.440 Darling, look at those model faces. 39:53.440 --> 39:55.080 The fame, the fame! 39:55.080 --> 39:57.160 Do you mind if I interview you? 39:57.160 --> 40:00.800 I would love to interview you, as well! I can do that. OK, good. 40:00.800 --> 40:04.560 I've never been to Pride before, so this is my first Pride. 40:04.560 --> 40:05.840 I've been out for a while. 40:05.840 --> 40:07.920 But, yeah, happy Pride. Happy Pride! 40:07.920 --> 40:10.080 Tell me about your experience as drag queens. 40:10.080 --> 40:12.200 Like, how old you were when you discovered...? 40:12.200 --> 40:15.880 But we're still only 15. Yeah, exactly, me too! 40:15.880 --> 40:18.440 I'm 12. Me too. I'm 12. No, you aren't. 40:18.440 --> 40:21.840 When did you come out? 26-7. 40:21.840 --> 40:25.280 Don't ask me how old I am. 40:21.840 --> 40:25.280 THEY LAUGH 40:25.280 --> 40:27.720 I wouldn't ask a lady that question! 40:29.000 --> 40:31.360 The last ten years, I think, changing a lot. 40:31.360 --> 40:32.640 It's changing a lot. 40:32.640 --> 40:35.240 But now, marriage, family, kids - it's on the table. 40:35.240 --> 40:38.640 It's all possible. Yeah, it's possible. 40:38.640 --> 40:42.880 The first Pride was held in New York in 1970. 40:42.880 --> 40:47.240 But Tokyo didn't see a parade until 1994. 40:47.240 --> 40:51.560 And just like in New York, it began as a political protest. 40:51.560 --> 40:54.840 Until the late 2000s, some marchers disguised themselves 40:54.840 --> 40:57.360 with masks and shades. 40:57.360 --> 41:00.760 But this year, there were 66,000 people, 41:00.760 --> 41:02.640 and the only masks were... 41:02.640 --> 41:04.280 Well, you know why. 41:04.280 --> 41:06.040 Thank you. Happy Pride! Happy Pride. 41:07.400 --> 41:10.800 It's emotional for me a little bit, cos I think when you're queer and 41:10.800 --> 41:13.840 you spend so much time being quiet and being silenced, 41:13.840 --> 41:16.560 Pride allows a space for people to come and feel safe 41:16.560 --> 41:19.440 showing who they really are, being able to be loud. 41:19.440 --> 41:20.880 Oh, my God! 41:23.000 --> 41:27.280 Here, the weather might be gloomy - but there are rainbows galore. 41:27.280 --> 41:29.200 And I've just seen a familiar face. 41:30.800 --> 41:32.840 Hello again! Hi. 41:32.840 --> 41:34.160 Oh, my God! Hi, sorry. 41:34.160 --> 41:35.880 How are you? Hi, how are you? 41:35.880 --> 41:38.280 Oh... This is amazing, yeah! 41:38.280 --> 41:43.200 Yesterday, I saw two men holding hands for the first time in my life, 41:43.200 --> 41:45.200 in Shibuya, and I was like... Oh, my gosh! 41:45.200 --> 41:49.000 Anybody who sees them would be like, "Oh, this is..." 41:49.000 --> 41:50.800 This is normal, it's not weird. 41:53.240 --> 41:57.120 What Pride has taught me is in so many places in the world, 41:57.120 --> 42:00.160 you can find a queer community. 42:00.160 --> 42:03.200 And many of us have been on similar journeys. 42:03.200 --> 42:05.520 There's strength in numbers, 42:05.520 --> 42:09.000 but individuals can make a difference. 42:09.000 --> 42:13.440 I've met them, and they've inspired me to say goodbye 42:13.440 --> 42:16.040 to that shame once and for all. 42:18.040 --> 42:22.000 I feel so much more comfortable, and I feel very proud. 42:22.000 --> 42:24.120 I mean it, not just because it was Pride. 42:24.120 --> 42:25.720 It's not like it's changed me. 42:25.720 --> 42:28.200 It's not like it's, erm, made me someone else, 42:28.200 --> 42:30.120 or I've discovered new elements of myself. 42:30.120 --> 42:32.680 It's just me being able to be myself in these situations. 42:32.680 --> 42:34.400 It's just been a real revelation. 42:35.920 --> 42:40.560 I just want to keep being in this Planet Sex-mode. 42:40.560 --> 42:43.720 Meeting people from around the world, connecting, listening 42:43.720 --> 42:46.640 to people's stories, trying to imagine their situation, 42:46.640 --> 42:50.240 trying to understand and, through that, understand more about myself, 42:50.240 --> 42:52.360 and hopefully ignite or inspire others 42:52.360 --> 42:54.040 to have similar conversations. 42:54.040 --> 42:56.680 I've just never done anything so personal. 42:59.840 --> 43:02.640 It just makes me realise what's important, and how much 43:02.640 --> 43:05.320 more active I want to be, in terms of trying to make 43:05.320 --> 43:07.800 some sort of small difference. 43:07.800 --> 43:10.080 Any difference is still better than nothing. 43:10.080 --> 43:12.120 OK, now what? I'm sad! 43:12.120 --> 43:14.960 Is it over? Is it over? 43:14.960 --> 43:17.200 It's never over. Pride is never over. 43:17.200 --> 43:18.400 Coming out. 43:18.400 --> 43:20.280 It was just a really beautiful experience, 43:20.280 --> 43:21.520 and I'm so grateful for it. 43:21.520 --> 43:25.120 Oh, don't, I'm going to get fucking emotional. I hate emotions! 43:25.120 --> 43:27.720 What do you want? Just say "cut"! 43:27.720 --> 43:30.040 Just... 43:27.720 --> 43:30.040 SHE LAUGHS